I started my walk with Jesus on January 16, 1976 just a few days before my 16th birthday. I was raised as a “preacher’s kid” starting at age 9. My father was raised in a little Baptist Church in NE Sedgwick County, while my mother was loosely raised Methodist in Western Kansas. While my mother came to follow Christ as an adult, my father came to Christ at the age of 8. In 1968 my dad felt God’s call to go into full time ministry as a Pastor. He was 30 years old. He sold our house and we moved to Springfield, Missouri where he attended Bible College. I was 9 years old.
I remember walking down the aisle at church once, maybe at age 5 or 6. I recalled later that I did it just because other kids were. I don’t remember anything about the event. Later when I was maybe 13 or 14, I remember thinking that I wasn’t saved and that I needed to be. I don’t remember feeling conviction or anything else; I just didn’t want to go to hell. So I went forward again and asked Christ to save me. At 16 I went to a Christian school. It was here under biblical teaching, Church teaching, and having Christian friends, that I saw my need to have a relationship with Jesus. So one day I felt God’s conviction and knew in my heart that I needed a Savior. I knelt at the sofa in our living room, alongside my dad, and I prayed that Jesus would be my Lord and Savior. For the first time in my life I truly believed in the gospel of Jesus and decided that day to follow him.
What has Jesus forgiven in my life? Everything! He has forgiven all my past, my present, and my future sins. He covered me with His shed blood on Calvary so that when God looks at me, He sees Christ’s perfection. Jesus’ redemptive work on the cross, which included His burial, and His resurrection, paid the price for my sin as atonement. Without the resurrection, I would have no hope of having a future in Heaven with God the Father. I still fail everyday. I struggle with laziness, selfishness, and a host of other sins. Praise God that the Holy Spirit is still working out my Salvation every day as He is perfecting me for Heaven.
My Christian walk and growth has had its ups and downs. There have been times and seasons in my life when I struggled to even pray and read the Bible. Conversely there have been times that I loved being in the Word, praying, and being part of the Church body. In 1992 I experienced a divorce that literally ripped by world apart. This was truly the lowest point of my life. I spent a year in Christian counseling, prayer, reflection, and healing. God healed me of the deep wounds of that failed relationship. At age 32 I had moved back into my parents’ house to recover financially, emotionally, and spiritually. It was during that time that my dad gave me a book by Watchman Nee titled The Normal Christian Life. This book had a tremendous impact on how I viewed my Christian life. I reread Romans 6-8 in a new way, realizing for the first time that I could not “try” hard enough to be a better Christian. I could not “do” enough to get better. It was the realization that I died with Christ and that my life is hid in Him. My identity was in Him. My “old self” was crucified with Him, and the sin that ruled my body was made of no effect I learned that I must die to myself and live in the strength and control of the Holy Spirit. I learned that I must first “know”, Romans 6:6, then “reckon”, Romans 6:11, and finally “yield”, Romans 6:16. This leads to consecration or sanctification of myself to God. I’ve learned and know that over the last 25 years that this is a slow and often arduous process. It was during this 4-year time from 1992-1996 that I began to trust God through the Holy Spirit for my faith to stand, walk, and run in my Christian life.
Since I began to trust God, He has given me a new family. I have been married for more than two decades, I have four stepchildren and several grandchildren. I continue to renew each day as God transforms my life through the Holy Spirit’s leading. May God bless you as you seek Him out.