I accepted Christ as my Savior at age 7. I knew I wanted what my family had–Jesus! I knelt beside my parents bed and my mother led me through the prayer to receive Christ. From that point, I had some disobedient moments in my teenage years–I struggled with telling the truth and did things not glorifying the Lord while growing up, not trusting that God was real. I was a Christian, but only one on the surface. I didn’t truly have a close relationship with the Lord because I wanted to be in control and believed that I was in control.
Somehow I had enough faith to say to the Lord in my thirties, “If there is anything keeping me from being my best for You, please help me to get rid of it to draw close to You.” From that moment forward, I realized I had always had a belief in God, but had no proof that He was real. I went on a search to find Him for myself, not just because my family believed. It was a long search of questions and seeking over a period of years. It was difficult and painful because I had moments of wondering if God was even real.
Through many hours spent in the Bible, listening to sermons, fasting, and going through Bible studies, I found God to be who He said He was. He revealed Himself to me in countless personal ways so that I could know, beyond a shadow of a doubt, He was real. I had lived most of my life being a “rule-follower,” thinking I was saved by my works. But, if that was the case, I was still in my sin and Jesus had died on the cross needlessly, so I knew He paid it all for me to live with Him eternally. You can’t get to Heaven by good works, it says so in Ephesians 2:8-9, “For it is by grace you have been saved, through faith–and this is not from yourselves, it is the gift of God–not by works, so that no one can boast.” To go to Heaven, you have to realize He paid for your admission in full, and your part is to ask Him to forgive you of your sins–it is the only way!
I have a close relationship with God now and I’m glad He is in control and I am not. I can’t wait to get up daily and spend time with Him and read His Word. I can give you many stories of how God “showed up” in my life to prove He was real, but one in particular sticks out as my favorite.
On 10/25/2002, I was asked to sing a solo and I was scared to death. I am blessed to have the gift of singing, and I’ve sung all of my life, so this shouldn’t have been a problem. But, I was singing in front of many alumni from the college I attended and I was afraid I was going to make a mistake and look like a fool. About 4pm the day of the concert, I realized I couldn’t do it by myself and I was going to have to trust God. He gave me the strength and I was able to perform the song with no problem. At that time, my husband and I were also trying to have a baby, but due to my anxiety of not being in control, I realized I would have to trust God for that, too. Exactly one year later (10/25/03 about 4pm), I delivered a beautiful, healthy baby! God wanted to prove to me that I am not in control, but He is. He is real and can be trusted with everything in your life. I’m living proof! He is a personal God who wants to communicate with each person personally.
Please don’t think that my life is “perfect” and free from problems, but the difference is I realize God can be trusted in all situations. I would say now that my life is complete because I finally trust in Him, know He is real, and enjoy a close relationship with Him daily. You can too, all you have to do is realize you are a sinner (we all are), ask Him to forgive you of your sins, and accept His free gift of salvation. He is ready and willing to accept you into His family!